Living in This Body

It's hell. Pure hell. 

Where I used to have a stomach that caved in, I have a belly that hangs out.

Where I used to have protruding hip bones, I have nothing. Except fat.

Where I used to have ribs, front and back, I have extra skin and back fat.

Where I used to have thighs thinner than my knees, I now have basketballs.

Where I used to have arms thinner than my elbows, I have wingdings and dangly things.

Where I used to have collar bones and chest bones, I now have padding and fat cells.

I am 150 lbs.  I have never been this big EVER.  I can't stop eating.  I can't stop.

I don't want to live if it has to be in this body.  It's disgusting.

Hell.